We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Terrible idea I love it
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Randomize
