I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Randomize
