I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Randomize
