I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
