Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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