the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
