life is too short to starve
life is also too short to be fat
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
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