Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
