I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
You're a waste of cheezeits
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
