Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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