You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize
