These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
