The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
Randomize
