We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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