Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize
