Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize
