So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
