turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
