So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
