I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
