pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Randomize
