considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
PANTIES FOUND
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
