Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
