And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
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