i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
