Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
She swung at the pinata with crutches
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
