i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
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