there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Randomize
