I feel like I'm in dance class right now
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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