My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Randomize
