You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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