How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
