Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
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