I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
Randomize
