TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
