Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize
