What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
