Porn is love you can see.
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Randomize
