Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
