i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
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