question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
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