he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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