Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
