Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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