I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
