i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
She's the barista slut.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Randomize
