My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
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