problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
