we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
