There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
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