They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
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